As I look at the influences on my life I think of my chief mentors and the key teachings that have shaped my life and thinking. My two greatest mentors were Dr. Billy Ball (now 86, very fragile) who entered my life in 1955, and Dr. Martyn Lloyd-Jones (1899-1981), who entered my life in 1963. The key teachings spring from three verses: (1) John 5:44, “How can ye believe, which receive honour one of another, and seek not the honour that cometh from God only?” (KJV). From 1957 to the present day that has been my life verse. Then there is (2) John 1:32: “I saw the Spirit come down from heaven as a dove and remain on him”. I develop this verse in my book The Sensitivity of the Holy Spirit. This has been absolutely life changing – finding out what grieves the Holy Spirit and not doing that. Believe me, it is a major challenge. But if have to say that alongside these two verses (3) is 2 Corinthians 5:10: “For we must all appear before the judgment seat of Christ, that each one may receive what is due him for the things done while in the body, whether good or bad”. I can remember where I was when this began to grip me the most – waiting for an order of fish and chips in a shop near Shepherd’s Bush in London. I came to see in a flash that it is there – at the Judgment and not until then – that we receive the recognition that matters.
To receive Christ’s own personal commendation, when he looks into our eyes and says “Well done”, is what will ultimately matter most of all to us. Not whether we get recognition, vindication or success here below. What we receive here below is a mere shadow of what Christ’s commendation will mean. When I became gripped with this truth my whole perspective changed. Although I wanted to see Revival in Westminster Chapel – yes, I surely did, I saw how this would mean almost nothing when I stand before God. His verdict of my life will be the true, objective one; not how I may be regarded here below.
One big question: will everything in our entire lives be revealed before all – including sins repented of and forgiven? Yes, according to my friend Arthur Blessitt. He says adamantly that ALL will come out – including past sins, even sins confessed and repented of. His reasoning is this: why would the people of the Bible (e.g. Moses, David and Solomon) be written up in Scripture? All they did was laid bare. Why should we be any different? He makes a good argument, but I disagree with him. I believe confessed sin – sin truly repented of – will be buried in God’s sea of forgetfulness never revealed (Psa.103:12). We have nothing to fear at the Judgment Seat of Christ except unconfessed sin and lack of true repentance.
These things said, I want to live my life as if all that is knowable about me will come out. It seems to me that living like this will make me more guarded and careful with my thoughts, words and deeds.
Read more in my book on this fascinating and important subject. On sale this month.